Ah, the anniversary post. Three years ago today I put up my first blog post here. I believe I had decided about a month prior to go ahead and focus on building a romance platform; maybe six months prior I had decided to focus on writing romance since I couldn’t get anything going with my fantasy writing. But, to be honest, the timeline in my memory is a bit blurry.
In a way I can’t believe it’s been three years – it doesn’t feel nearly that long. Then I remember that I’m 31 now, and three years is no longer such a huge chunk of my life. I’ve had only a few personal life changes to mark the time – changed jobs two years ago and got pregnant 9 months ago – but otherwise I’ve had nothing to mark the days except production.
In that sense three years depresses the hell out of me. The point of focusing on romance was to be able to produce at a reasonable rate. What I’ve gotten instead is a proliferation of ideas and stories started, but very little material actually finished. One rough draft of a novel and one finished novel, to be exact. What I think should be about a year’s production. I suppose if we take out the last nine months, for which I have been almost entirely worthless for writing, and then take out the first 9 months at my new job, which I started during a time of intense growth for the company and during which I worked a lot of long, exhausting days that left no time for writing, I have had about 18 months of good work time, and production rated on that scale isn’t so bad.
But the reality is…the 3 years are what life is, not the 18 “ideal” months within that time frame. Perhaps my goal for the next 3 years should be to learn how to write anyway. I’ve never been great at that, because I don’t like writing to feel like a chore, a job, a burden, but if I ever want to get out from under the day job, I have to learn how to produce even when I don’t feel like it. Or perhaps all that will happen is that motherhood will realign all my priorities and I will simply no longer care that I produce so slowly (or care with 100x more passion about being able to write full time so I can stay at home).
All I know is, with the things I have learned about the publishing industry both traditional and direct to consumer in the past 36 months, I still think I made the right choice for me. And that continues to make me happy, even if the road I started down so long ago has turned out to be longer and more arduous than I expected.