This Is Weird and Wrong, And I’m Not Sure I Can Live This Way

Or, What happens when your muse stops being polite, and starts getting real

So remember how I talked about not focusing on writing for the next month because of various other time commitments?  Yeah, about that….

Muse is annoyed with me. He is insisting that we have, god damn it, a standing date every morning at 5:30 a.m.  He doesn’t understand why I want to take a break. He thinks I am breaking up with him not going on sabbatical.

Apparently I have done my job too well in training my mind that my earliest waking hours are for writing. And not blog writing but real writing.

I feel anxious and upset at the prospect of not pulling open a document and putting some words down on a story.

Oh, dear.

So I guess I will go back to finishing the novel, with the understanding that it is ONLY to be worked on between the hours of 4 and 7 a.m. during the week and 5 and 9 on the weekends.

Now watch that contrary bastard blast into my head at full throttle every night that I am supposed to be sewing. In this case, I might really complain about 4000 word nights if they mean I don’t get to mask the way I want to mask on Mardi Gras Day.

But, for now, let’s see if I can’t just write the last 10,000 words of a 120K story 500 at at time….

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4 Comments

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4 responses to “This Is Weird and Wrong, And I’m Not Sure I Can Live This Way

  1. Oh, no, I cannot live vicariously through you on Mardi Gras if that genius of a mask/costume is not finished. So, tell Muse to go have a drink and hit the gutter while you sew.

    Then tell me how you trained him like that. My muse seems to have abandoned his feather boa and high heels and just wants to sleep.

    • Right? I won’t speak to him for a year if he can’t back off a little bit. Well, at least a sixmonth. Okay, a month.

      Damn it, no wonder he always seems to have his way with me…

      As to how I trained him? Public shaming. He shows up when I complain about how unreliable he is. I make a decision to not write, he comes flying in to contradict that logic as if his life depends on it (which, I don’t know, maybe in some Gaiman-esque way it actually does). Mostly I think just consistently sitting down at the same time, with the same ritual, with the same expectation that I’m going to sit here and either work or attempt to work. Now it’s my habit. My day doesn’t feel right if I don’t do it. Post-MG the trick will be taking it out of the realm of “show up and attempt to work” and into “show up and work” territory. Scary stuff, that. I might actually finish something that way. 🙂

      • My muse responds to the idea by rolling over and covering his head with a pillow. I dunno if you saw my blog on “smells”, but I think that’s the problem.

        He better enjoy this while it lasts, because I’m getting a case of air freshener.

      • ha! my muse ends up face down in the gutter pretty often, so long ago i made the decision to write whether he showed his face or not. things just go…so much quicker when he does.

        ADD is a blessing and a curse for writers, I think. It helps keep your mind interested in the world which can translate to your work, and when you get hyperfocused you get…hyper focused, but the rest of the time…oh, god. write 10 words, pace the house, write 10 more, get up and pee, write 10 more, refill my tea…yeah. been there more times than i care to think about. but if you just keep doing it, eventually those 10 words add up….

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